I have booked a few days away. There are a number of reasons for this, but the most over-riding is that I feel the need and have been slowly recognising that I need to go away and spend some time with God.
Now I have a confession to make, this is probably the first proper retreat I have ever attempted go on. It is not an organised one, but it is perhaps the first time I have ever gone away specifically to spend time alone with our Lord and creator. I also have to be honest and say I am more than a little nervous!
The thing is I am not very good at doing that quiet spirituality thing. Not very good at all. In fact I got quite a reputatuion for this when i was at vicar factory after I wrote this article in the student rag.
After much thought, and knowing my ability to avoid ‘quiet’ I decided that rather than go to a retreat centre where there are others, I booked 3 days in a cottage in an isolated village in the middle of an empty bit of Dorset coast. the thing about a retreat centre is that I would I fear avoid engaging with God by chatting to others there.
So, though I know I need this retreat, I cannot say I am necessarily looking forward to it!
It might even be true to say that I am not really sure what awaits me. I do not know how the next few days are going to be, what I am going to do, and how I am going to cope with the quiet.
My hope is that I’ll meet with God, hear some direction and generally recharge in His presence, but that is also a bit of my fear too.
I am not suggesting that this is in anyway meant to make sense. It’s just where I am at the moment.
So radio silence from now on, I’ll see you in a few days.